My Baba (that is grandma) has a leaky nose,
She leaves a trail of tissues everywhere she goes!
She is kinda wobbly, she really needs a cane…
And she calls me by my cousin’s name!
When her hearing aids are out
Everyone has to shout!
But even when she has them in…
We have to repeat everything again.
She says it’s cuz we talk too fast,
But I know that isn’t so,
It isn’t that we talk too fast
She just listens slow!
And she likes to hug me and that is okay,
But sometimes she squeezes me so tight
It takes my breath away!
And she smells like “cim a nom”
And that is way cool
Cuz it reminds that her cookie jar is
when God was giving talents
He didn’t give me a singing voice
Or music in my head
But He didn’t pass me by
He gave me rhyming words instead!
Oh my goodness…There are times
When everything I think or say
Comes out in rhymes!!
But when I feel like singing
That sure doesn’t help me
Even though my words rhyme
I still sing way off key!!!
But I don’t think God cares if I can carry a tune
Or play the piano or a big bassoon!
I can sing and dance and twirl and spin
When I am alone with Him!
The music that I hear spins around in my brain
But when it comes out of my mouth
It doesn’t sound the same!
But God knows my heart is bursting with song
And he cares for my soul and not the sound!
So when joy bursts out, when I can’t keep it in
My God knows… I sing for Him!!!
I am being pushed, pulled and dragged into this new(?) tech age kicking and screaming!!! I can’t do it I don’t understand it …..it scares me!
It all started when I advanced from the old typewriter to a word processor! That was a step I totally endorsed! Why I could type like a demon then go back and easily correct my mistakes. I was in writer’s heaven! Then…. the kids decided I needed to upgrade to a computer. I resisted, “really?” I said, ” I love my word processor” “oh, but Mom just look what you can do with a computer” it all looked so confusing… but the email part had me convinced… and could Google become my friend? Before I knew it a quarter of my tv room was filled with computer. It needed a desk with shelves to hold gigantic pieces of equipment… it had to be hooked up to the phone and there were cords everywhere! And.. of course it needed another shelf for a printer which entailed more cords! Oh my, had I sold my soul to the devil?!?!
About that same time I got my first cell phone! I did like my little flip phone… it was for emergencies right? I had to remember to take it with me, it was nice…but then the kids pushed me a little farther into the tech world… I needed to be able to text!!! Text? What is that? It took me awhile to get my fingers on the right buttons but soon I was texting away and enjoying the convenience! Oh, but wait!!! Now there are ‘eye’ or is it ‘I’phones? …oh come on… slow down technology. And then … you guessed it I was convinced I needed a smart phone!!! Well that would be fine if it was smarter than I seem to be!
So, back to the computer filling my tv room! Well, I never learned how to do a lot of those wonderful things on that monster but we became realatively good friends. We typed reports, wrote letters, emailed and googled! And then…the daughter decided I should have a lap top… “just look mom, you could take it into another room, you wouldn’t be confined to sitting at the monster’s desk and it would get rid of a lot of the ‘stuff’ and we could get rid of the huge desk and move the printer into the closet”. Halfway convinced I conceded! Of course there was an adjustment period but I had to admit it was a good move! I got to know Pinterest (be still my heart) I was introduced to Amazon, google maps, games…. there is an ap for everything!!!
You guessed it…. then it was decided I should get a tablet…. a what??? Not the Big Chief tablet of my youth… this one is smaller than that and oh so handy!! Ok I admit I love my tablet!!! I can do all the things I did on my laptop.. how cool is that!
A luxury becomes a necessity once you experience it! I heard that long ago and it is certainly true!
The I really stepped over the edge… I sucummed to electronic devices yesterday… oh what have I done now??? I am wearing a Fitbit!!! Am I crazy? The thing tells me how many steps I’ve taken and how many calories I’ve burned. That is a good thing but it also rouses me if I sit still for an hour, it even
wants to know how much water I drink. As my daughter hovers over me exclaiming all the wonderful things this little purple band is going to do, I am gasping for air sliding right into the technical world I have resisted every step of the way!!!
I walked up on my hill early this morning to watch the sun rise!!
I thought how utterly amazing that I could see this brilliant, golden globe rising from the horizon…I am THIS close to a star!!!! My imagination went wild as I thought of the gazillions of stars in the sky …all that bright and dazzling light that I am seeing is shining from each and every one of them! How mind boggling is that?
It is truly awe inspiring that our Creator chose this earth planet, out of all those He made, to put flora and fauna, and seas and birds, beasts and fishes and me!!!
Then I thought about how in just a few days (August 21, 2017) in the miraculous scheme of orbiting planets and moons, our very own moon is going to pass in front of that ginormous sun! It will block out its brilliance, its light, its life giving warmth for a very few minutes… a very few breath holding minutes!
There will be a very few minutes of darkness and the chill of no light.
When Jesus hung on the cross that very same darkness covered the earth but lasted an agonizing three hours!
The “Light of The World” had gone out!
The Bible tells us He descended into hell!
BUT on the third day the SON rose again…ablaze and brilliant…
Just like He said He would!
Think of that every morning at sunrise!
Do you remember that comic strip character? The rifle toting hunter after our beloved “waskily wabbit” Bugs Bunny?!
Well I had all but forgotten him in the midst of growing up and older until one day…..
Lexie was about three years old, I went to visit and she was out front..the wide driveway was her canvas as she meticulously covered it with chalk art. She had lots of hearts, stick figures, scribbles and her name in every color of chalk!!!! After our greetings of lots of hugs and kisses she pointed to a clear spot on the driveway and said, “draw Elmer Fudd right there!” “Wow Lexie” I said, “I don’t think I remember what Elmer Fudd looks like”, undaunted she went to her huge box of chalk, rummaged through it and came up with a blue-green piece, handed it to me, pointed at the chalk and said, “He is in there just make him come out!”
I stood there amazed at the wonder of a three year old and knew I had the smartest granddaughter on the face of the earth!
As I think back on that wonderful day I wonder are we all pieces of chalk in God’s hand?? Has He been making me “come out”?? Have I “come out” the way He intended?? My stick of chalk is getting shorter and is not much more than a stub… I do hope there is more ‘good’ God can draw out of me!!!
Like most homemakers, or at least I like to think I am like most, I am continually ‘redoing’ something. Move the furniture, buy some new pillows, hang a new picture, paint a wall…well you get the idea! So this spring as I was thinking of making things more colorful around here I happened upon Bohemian decor (you can find anything on Pinterest). Oh, I thought I love that…I have always loved bright brilliant colors…lime green, , tangerine, purple, red, yellow… I guess that is the Gypsy in my soul, my Slovak genes…almost Bohemian!!!
So I said to myself…that is a little ‘much’ for a room in the house but how about my back porch? I love that porch!! Sooooo I started with bright striped cushions, using every bright colored scrap in my stash of fabric then I made the most outrageous, bright pillows for the settee, bright cloths for the tables, hanging windsock of every color imaginable, painted cowboy boots and pots of flowers and twisted yards and yards and yards of bright colored rags to roll round and round to make chairs mats! That should satisfy that craving for color… that Gypsy in my soul! But no…I sit in all my Bohemian glory and think…what more does this porch need? I could add this or that or I could paint one more hunk of junk ….when is enough enough??? Enough color, enough plants, enough whimsy enough joy?
I am preparing this beautiful though crazy spot to spend a few months in this summer while Jesus is busy preparing a place for me in heaven (John 14:2) for ETERNITY.. I am sure that will finally be enough, more than enough…love, joy and color!!
So, I finally did it… retired from a job I loved…I didn’t really want to but it had to happen one day! I figured I better get down off the horse before it threw me off! Here I am in my first week of retirement and I’ve been busy attending parties! Oh my, I had really wanted to quietly ride off in the sunset but my wonderful friends and coworkers did not let that happen! I feel their kind words give me way too much credit! I’ve truly just been the tool in God’s hand! It has been so fun and fulfilling. He knows my heart so I am sure He has something wonderful for me to do! May I glorify Him always!
My sister who raised her children on a farm tells the story of calling for her toddler playing outside.. when he didn’t respond she hollored “Steven, say mama!” When he did she followed his voice and found him behind the chicken coop!
I incorporated that technique when texting my grandkids… if I do not get a response I text ‘just say Baba’ so I know they are alright!
Days after Lexie died I yearned to text her … ‘just say Baba’
In fact I said it in my heart over and over, ‘Lex, just say Baba’ I want to know that you are Ok.
The week after the beautiful memorial as I was sorting through some children’s books for Twice Upon A Time*, A red bag of books was lying on top of a new delivery. I pulled out the top book… ‘There’s A Party In Heaven’* My text from Lexie just saying ‘Baba’ had arrived!
*There’s a Party In Heaven by Gary Bower
*Twice Upon A Time is a ministry collecting gently used and outgrown children’s books to distribute to less privileged children to encourage reading. To date this ministry (soon to celebrate its fifth year) has distributed over 11,000 books!
Oh,so many times, when hearing about a personal tragedy in people’s lives I’ve thought, “how can they endure? How do you live through such a tragedy and if you do how do you keep living?” I know I have especially uttered those words over a child’s suicide! And here I find myself……
My darling Lexie, my first grandchild, beautiful, intelligent (just graduated Cum Laude) twenty one, such potential, caring, loving, creative …the list goes on, I called her ‘my baby girl’
But I have discovered how you continue on, how you endure, how you live through and beyond the pain and heartbreak! It hurts…oh, how it hurts but I am being held up, held together by the many prayers uttered on my behalf. God is using all the prayers and love from family, friends and neighbors to build a strong scaffolding around my crumbling soul.
Wow What a wonderful time with family. Two days of good food and good fun!! All twelve grandkids together! I am so blessed! Hugs from big kids and little. Our tradition of everyone in the family reading a portion of scripture to tell the Christmas story is always the highlight! Thank you Lord for this family of mine!